fishkeeping spouses (spice if you're married to more than one) are pretty accommodating if the need is understood. Around here there are limits though and if I am at all open minded, any limits to my craziness are very reasonable and probably overdue.
And Amen to the idea that being curled up viewing the fish is not the very finest context for being curled up. It is nicer with her along. :)
I really have cut back on fish-organization stuff (and some web time) at times, as I realize that being with our kids when they are in this part of the world or my lady, whose company is indeed a gift of God's, is far more important.
I'm not surprised that you are sensitive to what the ammonia is and what the consequences of all those levels are. Felt that it should be mentioned though in the context of starting a new aquarium, especially since these are public discussions.
On that kit thing, there always seem to be new gadgets and stuff one can buy. Sometimes I'm amazingly ignorant of what specifically is going on in a certain tank. Just look at it and go, "Ahhhhhagh! Time for a water change.... or maybe a series of them." ;)
All the best!
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